*snåx×

2 GABA + HALF XAN = COMA TIL TMRW?!

here’s hoping!!

A Bad Decision

Trickle down effect

I knew you were bad news.

Bad news.

I’m bad news.

“Trouble.” They call me that, sometimes.

I’ve adopted several nicknames. Trouble. Scandal. Bad News.

I can’t stop myself. I’m controlled by something I can’t identify and it draws me to these complicated situations. I like to cause a stir and ditch. Watch the aftermath like a fly on the wall.

What have I gotten myself into? A mess. This is all a mess.

You’ve been acting awful tough lately

Smoking a lot of cigarettes lately

But inside, you’re just a little baby.

It’s ok to say you’ve got a weak spot

you don’t always have to be on top

Better to be hated than love love loved for what you’re not.

You’re vulnerable

You are not a robot

You’re loveable, so loveable

But you’re just troubled

Guess what? I’m not a robot, a robot.

You’ve been hanging with unloved kids

who you never really likes and you never trusted

But you are so magnetic, you pick up all the pins.

Never committing to anything,

Don’t pick up the phones when it ring, ring, rings

Don’t be so pathetic, just open up and sing.

ner ner ner ner ner ner ner ner ner ner

(via buddhabrot)

There are times when you settle comfortably into a seemingly cold or unwelcoming thought. There are times when I do, at least. I catch myself throughout the days obsessing over tiny moments where I’ve done something or said something stupid or off-the-wall… foot-in-mouth moments. I pick them apart until I’m literally screaming at my brain to shut up. Actually shouting at myself. I have to force myself to take a few steps back and compare the situation to whatever it is I think I’m losing. And ultimately the answer is I’m losing nothing… nothing that matters.

I’m settling into the thought of loneliness and it is so warm and comfortable to me. All these foot-in-mouth moments and my obsession with them are born out of a thought or a need to reel someone in. And I just don’t want to reel anyone in anymore. I want to be alone, I want to worry about me.

The thought is so relieving. I’m letting go of the everyone and settling into the me. Worrying about me and what I think. And what I think is that if I didn’t support whatever I did or said at that particular moment, I wouldn’t have done it.

Maybe this all sounds jaded or whacko, whatever. But ultimately, I just don’t give a fuck anymore.

Settling in to being a lone, and it’s enveloping me like that first moment when you submerge your body in a hot bath.

“ All humans are essentially wild creatures and hate confinement. We need what is wild, and we thrill to it, our wildness bubbling over with an anarchic joie de vivre. We glint when the wild light shines. The more suffocatingly enclosed we are - tamed by television, controlled by mortgages and bureaucracy - the louder our wild genes scream in aggression, anger and depression.

Jay Griffiths

(via jeanmichaelseminaro)

(via thetruthisone-deactivated201203)